Are you in the mood for Christmas yet?

We're getting closer to Christmas which means we are getting closer to that time of year when those fucking bible bashers come on the telly and tell us that the spirit of Christmas is all about the little baby Jesus.

Let's get one thing straight. Christmas pre-dates Jesus.

Jesus was not a baby, he was a grown man who dated a prostitute.

As a grown man Jesus would have had to fight the urge to masturbate. In a survey of Jewish men (the J-man was Jewish) it transpires that 100% of Jewish men masturbate.

Jesus was therefor a wanker. That's science bitches!

So don't you come on the telly and tell me I have to worship some hooker fucking wanker and celebrate his birthday 20 centures after the prick died, especially as research suggests he was born on September 20th 6AD anyway.

Oh yes that's another thing, the bible dateline starts with the whole holy star 3 wise men thing - 6 years before Jesus' birth. Was it really a coincidence this star was seen a couple of counries away from Bethlehem 6 years before his birth? You decide... I've made up my own mind based on the premise that i'm not a clueless fucking idiot.

And another thing... Before you go celebrating the birth of the Jewish whore fucking wanker this year, despite his birthday being moved to December 3 centuries after his death by Papal decree, remember that Christmas is a Pagan festival which we celebrate in this country because of the wanning of Roman authority at the time Christianity took route in Roman culture. The senate had to compromise because the mob refused to stop celebrating the festival.

That's right, Christianity is a Roman tradition and Christmas predates it. You know those people you learned about in Primary School who spent their time eating grapes during orgies of varied sexual orientation and who imposed a genocidal rule over Europe: That's the birth of Christianity that is, right there, next to the bum fucking Roman gladiator and his self pleasuring slave owning master.

Christmas however is not a Roman tradition. Christmas is a celebration that the nights are getting shorter. You are celebrating the turning point of winter. Therefor if you live in the Southern hemisphere and you celebrate Christmas then you are a fucking idiot.

And before you go condeming me to hell for writing this, yes i'm well aware that i'll be "going to hell" according to you, although according to me i'll be getting the last laugh as you find out that if there really is a divine being in the universe, the last thing that an all-loving omnipotent omnipresent God is going to use as a yardstick for entry to the gates of heaven is somebody telling you on an internet site that you are totally fucking wrong and it's about time you developed some rational thought processes before you waste your life praying to the largest land owning richest corporation on Earth. Sorry, to Jesus.

Such a being however might just take exception to letting a thick twat who's completely incapable of sane and rational thought into paradise. It wouldn't be paradise if it was full of right wing fascist pricks wearing dresses and praising the head of the corporation. Sorry, the pope. Would it?

But this is why I dont have comments enabled on my blog, I can outrage you all I like and what are you going to do about it?

Haha sucker.

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